The Dangers of Thinking

This is from an e-mail I received from my sister. I thought it was hilarious! I went from a registered Democrat to a registered Republican.

The Dangers Of Thinking

It started out innocently enough. I began to think at parties now and then -- just to loosen up.

Inevitably, though, one thought led to another, and soon I was more than just a social thinker.

I began to think alone -- "to relax," I told myself --but I knew it wasn't true. Thinking became more and more important to me, and finally I was thinking all the time.

That was when things began to sour at home. One evening I had turned off the TV and asked my wife about the meaning of life. She spent that night at her mother's.

I began to think on the job. I knew that thinking and employment don't mix, but I couldn't stop myself.

I began to avoid friends at lunchtime so I could read Thoreau and Kafka. I would return to the office dizzied and confused, asking, "What is it exactly we are doing here?"

One day the boss called me in. He said, "Listen, I like you, and it hurts me to say this, but your thinking has become a real problem. If you don't stop thinking on the job, you'll have to find another job."

This gave me a lot to think about. I came home early after my conversation with the boss. "Honey," I confess, "I've been thinking..."
"I know you've been thinking," she said, "and I want a divorce!"
"But Honey, surely it's not that serious."
"It is serious," she said, lower lip aquiver. "You think as much as college professors, and college professors don't make any money, so if you keep on thinking, we won't have any money!"
"That's a faulty syllogism," I said impatiently. She exploded in tears of rage and frustration, but I was in no mood to deal with the emotional drama. "I'm going to the library," I snarled as I stomped out the door.

I headed for the library, in the mood for some Nietzsche. I roared into the parking lot with NPR on the radio and ran up to the big glass doors... They didn't open.
The library was closed.

To this day, I believe that a Higher Power was looking out for me that night. Leaning on the unfeeling glass, whimpering for Zarathustra, a Poster caught my eye, "Friend, is heavy thinking ruining your life?" it asked.

You probably recognize that line. It comes from the standard Thinkers Anonymous poster.

Which is why I am what I am today: a recovering thinker.

I never miss a TA meeting. At each meeting we watch a non-educational video; last week it was, "Porky's." Then we share experiences about how we avoided thinking since the last meeting. I still have my job, and things are a lot better at home. Life just seemed . . . easier, somehow, as soon as I stopped thinking.

I think the road to recovery is nearly complete for me.

Today I made the final step . . . I registered to vote as a Democrat!

Mom's birthday is today

Today is my mom's birthday. This is the first birthday she has celebrated since Dad passed away. She doesn't really celebrate her birthday any more.

What Are They Afraid Of?

I was on ICR's Web site today and saw this article. The last paragraph voices my thoughts exactly. I have thought that since all this furor over evolution only in the schools started. It basically says that evolutionists don't want anything else taught because they are afraid that evolution won't stand up under scrutiny and they don't like the implications of there being a creator. A creator would mean a higher authority and that means they would have to be accountable to Some One higher. It would seem they are happy with no accountability.

Subject: Ode to Email

I received this in an e-mail from a friend. This is just a few of the bogus rumors e-mails that are going around. Any time I get one of these rumor e-mails I go to www.snopes.com to check it out.

**Thank You**

** My heartfelt appreciation goes out to all of you who have taken the time and trouble to send me "forwards" over the past 12 months. **

**Thank you for making me feel safe, secure, blessed, and wealthy.**

**Extra thanks to whoever sent me the one about rat crap in the glue on envelopes, because I now have to go get a wet towel every time I need to seal an envelope. **

**Also, I have to scrub the top of every can I open for the same reason.**

**Because of your concern I no longer drink Coca Cola because it can remove toilet stains. **

**I no longer drink Pepsi or Dr. Pepper, since the people who make these products are atheists who refuse to put "Under God" on their cans.**

**I no longer use Saran wrap in the microwave because it causes cancer.**

**I no longer check the coin return on pay phones because I could be pricked with a needle infected with AIDS. **

**I no longer use cancer-causing deodorants, even though I smell like a water buffalo on a hot day. **

**I no longer go to shopping malls because someone might drug me with a cologne sample and rob me. **

**I no longer receive packages from, nor send packages by, UPS or FedEx since they are actually Al Qaeda in disguise. **

**I no longer answer the phone, because someone will ask me to dial a number for which I will get a phone bill with calls to Jamaica, Uganda, Singapore and Uzbekistan. **

**I no longer eat KFC because their chickens are actually horrible mutant freaks with no eyes or feathers. **

**I no longer have any sneakers -- but that will change once I receive my free replacement pair from Nike. **

**I no longer have to buy expensive cookies from Neiman Marcus since I now have their recipe.**

**I no longer worry about my soul because at last count I have 363,214 angels looking out for me. **

**Thanks to you, I have learned that God only answers my prayers if I forward an e-mail to seven of my friends and make a wish within five minutes. **

**I no longer have any money because I gave them to a sick girl who is about to die in the hospital (for the 258th time) but that will change once I receive the $15,000 that Microsoft and AOL are sending me for participating in their special email program. **

**Yes, I want to thank you so much for looking out for me that I will now return the favor! **

**If you don't send this e-mail to at least 144,000 people in the next 7 minutes, a large pigeon with a wicked case of diarrhea will land on your head at 5:00 p. m. (CDT) this afternoon. I know this will occur because it actually happened to a friend of my next door neighbor's ex-mother-in-law's second husband's cousin's beautician.**

Pass the potato

Help get my potato to all 50 states! - on - PassThePotato.com!

Six Months Already

It's hard to believe that my dad passed away 6 months ago today. I still miss him every day. I still catch myself thinking "I can't wait until Pop gets back so I can ask him about this." Then I realize he isn't coming back and the tears start again. I'm even crying as I type this right now. I didn't think I could miss a person as deeply as I miss him.

Happy Birthday Linda

Today is my little sister's birthday. She is 13 months, 18 days younger than me. She is living and working in West Point, New York for now. Her husband is in the US Army and he is stationed at the United States Military Academy. He will have served for 20 years this spring. I miss her not being close during the holidays and birthdays.

I hope she has a good day.

Hamas Promises To 'Liberate' Rest Of Palestine

KCCI.com - News - Hamas Promises To 'Liberate' Rest Of Palestine

GAZA CITY, Gaza Strip -- With a landslide election victory under his belt, Hamas leader Ismail Haniyeh promises to complete what he calls "the liberation of other parts of Palestine."

The militant group's leader didn't clarify which territories he was talking about or what strategy he'll use.

In a victory news conference, Haniyeh said Hamas took more than 60 percent of the vote in Wednesday's parliament elections. The Hamas leader said he doesn't expect President Mahmoud Abbas to resign.

Abbas' Fatah Party took a hard loss in the election. Election officials said Hamas won 76 of the 132 seats in the Palestinian parliament.

The election outcome could have a devastating effect on the peace process. Hamas has dedicated itself to the destruction of Israel, and Israel and the United States both regard Hamas as a terrorist group. And a senior Hamas official said Thursday that recognizing Israel and negotiating with it are, "not on our agenda."


President George W. Bush said Wednesday that the United States will not deal with Hamas unless it renounces violence.

Iowa Republican Party :: News Item

"A person who kidnaps, rapes and murders a child could be sentenced to death under a Senate bill introduced Monday, the first day of the 2006 session.

Seventeen of 25 Republican senators are co-sponsors of Senate File 2010.

GOP leaders have been trying since last spring to engage Democrats in a debate to revive the death penalty. Iowa hasn't had a capital punishment law for 41 years."

I don't know if the death penalty will be a deterrent to future crime but I do know it will stop that person from re-offending. That is reason enough, in my mind, to warrant it.

Could You Pass 8th Grade Science?

You Passed 8th Grade Science

Congratulations, you got 8/8 correct!

Could You Pass 8th Grade Science?

What Does Your Birth Month Mean?

Your Birth Month is January

You are a natural leader who is able to stand up when no one else can. Strong and powerful, you tend to overshadow those around you. Your soul reflects: deep love, fascination with life, and a distinctive persona Your gemstone: Garnet Your flower: Snowdrop Your colors: Black, dark red, and dark blue

What Does Your Birth Month Mean?

What Does Your Birthdate Mean?

Your Birthdate: January 6

You tend to be the rock in relationships - people depend on you. Thoughtful and caring, you often put others needs first. You aren't content to help those you know... you want to give to the world. An idealist, you strive for positive change and dream about how much better things could be. Your strength: Your intuition Your weakness: You put yourself last Your power color: Rose Your power symbol: Cloud Your power month: June

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

22 Congressmen Hate Christmas

"Whereas Christmas is a national holiday celebrated on December 25; and

Whereas the Framers intended that the First Amendment to the Constitution of the United States would prohibit the establishment of religion, not prohibit any mention of religion or reference to God in civic dialog: Now, therefore be it resolved, that the House of Representatives -

(1) Recognizes the importance of the symbols and traditions of Christmas;
(2) Strongly disapproves of attempts to ban references to Christmas; and
(3) Expresses support for the use of these symbols and traditions, for those who celebrate Christmas."

Click on the title for the whole article including the 22 Representatives who voted against the resolution.

Wisconsin Elementary School Changes 'Silent Night' While Decorating For A Christmas Witch

"In Dodgeville, Wisconsin, Ridgeway Elementary School's 'winter program' has changed the name of 'Silent Night' to 'Cold in the Night.' Sung to the tune of 'Silent Night,' the lyrics include: 'Cold in the night, no one in sight, winter winds whirl and bite, how I wish I were happy and warm, safe with my family out of the storm.'

The 'winter program' included decorating classrooms with Santa Claus, Kwanza symbols, Menorahs, and Labafana--a Christmas witch!

Also in Wisconsin, the Glendale-River Hills School District has banned every Christmas song which has any Christian 'motive or theme.' But while banning Christian Christmas songs, the district permits secular holiday songs as well as songs celebrating Hanukkah. In defending this policy, Frances Smith, the district administrator, says that the Hanukkah songs are more cultural than spiritual.

What these schools are doing to our children is not educating, but indoctrinating! And they are using Christmas as an excuse. Following the lead of the National Educational Association, Wisconsin educational leaders preach tolerance and diversity while being highly intolerant! Most of the residents of Wisconsin are tolerant, but not their educational leaders.

Banning nativity scenes. Banning Christmas songs in school. Banning Christmas in advertising. Calling a Christmas tree a 'holiday' tree. Calling a Christmas parade a holiday parade. Refusing to mention the Reason for the season. It is time to take a stand for our children, our families, our faith and our freedom! "

Disney's 'Narnia': Christ Need Not Apply

The following article is from NewsMax.com. For the last several years Disney has been more interested in making money than anything else. The movies they have been making is plenty of evidence of that fact. Their marketing of the Chronicles of Narnia should not be that surprising. This is just more wood on the fire.

"Disney's holiday season release of 'The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe' is set for this weekend -- and some Christians are worried the media giant is more intent on cashing in on the faithful, rather than sharing the film's Christian message.

The Disney backed film is based on one of C.S. Lewis' 'Narnia' books. Lewis was a noted Christian apologist, and his Narnia books have been viewed as religious allegory about the life of Christ.

While Disney clearly hopes to tap into the same audience that made Mel Gibson's 'The Passion of the Christ' a huge box office hit, the same people behind the firm version of 'Narnia' are vocal in downplaying its supposed links to Christianity.

"Faith is in the eye of the beholder," declared one of the movie's actresses, Tilda Swinton, who said Lewis' original book is more "spiritual" than religious.

"You can make a religious allegory out of anything if that's what you're interested in," she told BBC News.

The $150 million film, made by Walden Media and distributed by Disney, is the story of a struggle between good and evil in the snowy kingdom of Narnia. Four English siblings enter the enchanted land and discover talking animals who await the return of the lion king, Aslan. The inhabitants believe he will free them from the tyranny of Jadis, the White Witch.

Aslan sacrifices himself to save the life of a human boy, or "Son of Adam." He later rises from the dead to lead his troops in a battle against the witch's forces.

But the film's director, Andrew Adamson, also has pooh-poohed the idea that the allegory reveals Christ's resurrection, saying that concept is a common theme in the fantasy genre.

"The religious aspect is something the press is more interested in than the world at large," he told the BBC.

Said "Narnia's" producer, Mark Johnson: "When I read the book as a child, I accepted it as a pure adventure story. It never occurred to me Aslan was anything more than a great lion" rather than a Christ figure.

"Christian themes were very important to C.S. Lewis and imbued everything he did, but he himself denied any religious implications."

Despite those comments from the movie's creators, the film has already received pledges of support from evangelical groups in the United States, many of whom say Lewis - who wrote seven books in the "Narnia" series - did create the story as an allegory about the life of Jesus.

Reportedly, elementary schoolchildren and teenagers in Bible study groups are booking theaters to see the PG-rated movie, which opens Friday.

"We believe that God will speak the gospel of Jesus Christ through this film," said Lon Allison, director of Illinois' Billy Graham Center.

But a Hollywood insider who has dealt with Disney's marketing executives told NewsMax that the media giant has had great apprehension promoting the film to Christian groups and has done so only in a low-key manner.

"Disney is loathing the idea that the likes of Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity or a preacher like Jerry Falwell will actively promote the film. They want the Christian community's money, but not their viewpoint," the source said.

Last year, Hollywood witnessed the Christian zeal for Gibson's "Passion" movie, which has grossed anywhere from $400 million to more than $600 million worldwide, depending on the source.

The producers of "Narnia" have generated advance buzz among Christians by showing previews to Christian leaders, preachers and evangelical organization, according to the Louisville Courier-Journal.

USA Today asked: "Is the world created by C.S. Lewis a rip-roaring piece of fantasy - or a fairy tale suffused with Christian imagery?

"The answer is both, and that raises a related question: Can Disney succeed by selling the movie on two tracks - as a sort of cross between ‘The Lord of the Rings' and ‘The Passion of the Christ'? If so, ‘Narnia' figures to be a holiday blockbuster."

Said producer Johnson: "We're not selling the movie to any particular group. With a movie this size, we're trying to sell it to everybody."
Put another way, Disney would like to sell "Narnia" minus Christ - but still have Christians pay the bill. "

DailyJoke

"The True Origin of the Internet

In ancient Israel, it came to pass that a trader by the name of Abraham Com did take unto himself a young wife by the name of Dot.

And Dot Com was a comely woman, broad of shoulder and long of leg. Indeed, she had been called 'Amazon Dot Com.'

And she said unto Abraham, her husband, "Why dost thou travel far from town to town with thy goods when thou can trade without ever leaving thy tent?"

And Abraham did look at her as though she were several saddle bags short of a camel load, but simply said, "How, dear?" And Dot replied, "I will place drums in all the towns and drums in between to send messages saying what you have for sale and they will reply telling you which hath the best price. And the sale can be made on the drums and delivery made by Uriah's Pony Stable (UPS)."

Abraham thought long and decided he would let Dot have her way with the drums. And the drums rang out and were an immediate success. Abraham sold all the goods he had at the top price, without ever moving from his tent.

But this success did arouse envy. A man named Maccabia did secrete himself inside Abraham's drum and was accused of insider trading. And the young man did take to Dot Com's trading as doth the greedy horsefly take to camel dung. They were called Nomadic Ecclesiastical Rich Dominican Siderites, or NERDS for short.

And lo, the land was so feverish with joy at the new riches and the deafening sound of drums that no one noticed that the real riches were going to the drum maker, one Brother William of Gates, who bought up every drum company in the land. And indeed did insist on making drums that would work only with Brother Gates' drumheads and drumsticks.

And Dot did say, "Oh, Abraham, what we have started is being taken over by others."

And as Abraham looked out over the Bay of Ezekiel, or as it came to be known "eBay" he said, "We need a name that reflects what we are."

And Dot replied, "Young Ambitious Hebrew Owner Operators."

"YAHOO," said Abraham.

And that is how it all began. It wasn't Al Gore after all."

Could You Pass 8th Grade Math?

You Passed 8th Grade Math

Congratulations, you got 9/10 correct!

Could You Pass 8th Grade Math?

Sermon Notes

I was cleaning some of the old bulletins out of my Bible this afternoon and found a bulletin that I had written some notes in about death from a sermon on John 11:11-16. That is the passage about the death of Lazarus. Here is what I have written:

Biblical Death
is separation
1. Physical - soul from body
2. Spiritual - soul from God, no intimacy with God
3. Eternal - permanent, separation of soul from God - Hell

Death is a doorway not a passage.
"We are confident, I say, and willing rather to be absent from the body, and to be present with the Lord." 2 Corinthians 5:8


This was from July 3, 2005. Little did we know Dad only had about 6 weeks left at this point. July 3rd to August 26th is not that long after all.

Two Month Mark

Yesterday was the two month anniversary of Dad's passing. I'm doing better, at least I'm not crying every day anymore. Just about anything can set me off but I don't cry at everything now. I assume things will keep getting better. Monday the 24th would have been Dad's 81st birthday.

DailyJoke

"An elderly woman died last month. Having never married, she requested no male pallbearers. In her handwritten instructions for her memorial service, she wrote, 'They wouldn't take me out while I was alive, I don't want them to take me out when I'm dead.'"

This is my feeling exactly!!